Devalued Women

How many guys out there have a real hard time with women? Oh yeah that’s me all the way. Every time I was taking a girl to a dance during school, mom would go over how to treat a lady. These talks would sometimes go on for an hour, so usually I started daydreaming. One thing I noticed in life is that every girl I treat with the knowledge my mom gave me thinks I want to date them. At least three times in college I knew a girl for several months, treated her as I would a close friend, but with the respect a woman deserves, and they always thought I wanted more then just a friendship. Everytime I was clueless on what to say, how do you convince a girl her assumption was incorrect without hurting their feelings? I guess as Donald Miller puts it, women are use to being devalued, and when they are valued they assume you want something.

I just finished chapter five out of Donald Miller’s book “Searching For God Knows What”, and really enjoyed some of what he was saying. “now that there are women all around and a guy can go on the Internet and see them naked anytime he wants, the whole species has been devalued.” (Page 65). Women have been devalued in today’s culture so much.

When is the last time you opened a door for a girl? When is the last time you carried a heavy load for a girl? I watched a guy at the mall the other day cut a mother pushing her baby off. He almost knocked the stroller over, and never apologized. The same lady I was helping out of a store, through some double doors. I could only hold one set open, and I saw I guy coming and figured he would help. This guy pushed his way around us and raced out the door in front of the mother, how rude.

I think girls that know me assume that because I have been single longer then any other man my age, I am like a hungry dog waiting for a girl to come my way. Thanks for the credit?? Come on girls can’t you give a guy a break and just let him be nice to you, without always assuming he wants to date you?

I was reading a blog of a girl that was up here visiting her friends and checking out Mosaic. I thought she worded kind of what I am saying in a way that a woman might understand. “my conversation with him reminded me of my worth, that i am a precious treasure. i haven't been myself for quite a while, so it is amazing to get around someone who knows the real me and have him remind me of who i actually am. i started crying at the table because i was so moved by the way he treated me. he didn't do anything out of the ordinary, he just treated me like a woman should be treated - with respect. i don't think guys in my life have treated me with respect recently. you wanna know why...because i haven't demanded it. when i act like a woman who is worthy of respect, that is what i get.” (Misty from Arkansas).

To put what I am saying in the reader’s digest version. Do women wanted to be treated like one of the guys, just another dude, or do they want to be treated they way they were meant to be with respect and kindness. There is no way I could treat a girl like one of the guys, my mom did her job training me to be a gentleman too well.